1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:02,399 previously on Dumbgeons and Dragons. 2 00:00:02,399 --> 00:00:03,359 Stop yelling. 3 00:00:04,160 --> 00:00:07,200 I'm drawing attention to the man peeing into the hot wind. 4 00:00:10,480 --> 00:00:16,640 The figure turns and looks over his shoulder and he has this unnerving smile on his face. 5 00:00:17,600 --> 00:00:18,800 The Russell special. 6 00:00:18,800 --> 00:00:19,300 Hi. 7 00:00:20,879 --> 00:00:24,800 I didn't know. Sometimes there's good people who come down here and they're like, 8 00:00:24,800 --> 00:00:29,920 I'm a goody goody two shoes. I don't want to hurt anybody or carry soul coins. 9 00:00:30,480 --> 00:00:35,600 Oh, you see, we are good people, but we can kill as many people as we want in order to 10 00:00:36,960 --> 00:00:38,240 further our goodness. 11 00:00:39,760 --> 00:00:40,640 To save the world. 12 00:00:40,640 --> 00:00:42,480 I mean, we're trying to save the world here. 13 00:00:42,480 --> 00:00:44,719 So we kind of have to like do some stuff to make it happen. 14 00:00:44,719 --> 00:00:45,840 Got to break a couple eggs. 15 00:00:47,760 --> 00:00:48,719 I like you. 16 00:00:48,719 --> 00:00:49,760 I like you all. 17 00:00:49,760 --> 00:00:50,480 Come with me. 18 00:00:50,960 --> 00:00:54,560 Race me down the hill and he tears off down the hill towards the 19 00:00:55,439 --> 00:00:57,040 war machines down at the bottom. 20 00:00:57,040 --> 00:00:59,200 Oh my God, I'm not running down this hill, you guys. 21 00:01:00,320 --> 00:01:03,440 It's OK. You can ride on the back of my steed that I'm going to summon. 22 00:01:06,079 --> 00:01:07,920 Oh, no, it's a casting time of 10 minutes. 23 00:01:10,480 --> 00:01:12,719 We get to the bottom, your steed arrives. 24 00:01:14,159 --> 00:01:15,519 Wait up. I'm coming. 25 00:01:19,439 --> 00:01:21,120 Welcome to Dumbgeons and Dragons. 26 00:01:21,120 --> 00:01:22,960 I'm your Dungeon Master, Russ More. 27 00:01:22,960 --> 00:01:27,920 He, him also with me today is Carla Backstead. 28 00:01:28,560 --> 00:01:31,200 I knew you were going to pick me because I wasn't really ready. 29 00:01:32,159 --> 00:01:37,040 She, her playing Lipsinki, Pip Diggins, also she, her. 30 00:01:37,040 --> 00:01:38,719 And Amy More. 31 00:01:38,719 --> 00:01:39,599 Second again. 32 00:01:40,560 --> 00:01:42,000 Always a bridesmaid. 33 00:01:42,000 --> 00:01:43,599 She, her playing. 34 00:01:46,240 --> 00:01:47,439 And one time a bride. 35 00:01:49,439 --> 00:01:50,560 There was that one time. 36 00:01:50,560 --> 00:01:51,439 It was pretty. 37 00:01:51,439 --> 00:01:52,400 I thought it was pretty good. 38 00:01:54,400 --> 00:01:55,280 Shut up, you guys. 39 00:01:55,280 --> 00:01:56,719 I'm trying to do my intro. 40 00:01:58,879 --> 00:01:59,760 Sorry, who do you play? 41 00:01:59,760 --> 00:02:03,920 I play Thea Massaccia, she, her and Night Hunter, she, they. 42 00:02:03,920 --> 00:02:05,120 And Tom Laird. 43 00:02:05,120 --> 00:02:09,439 Hey, that's me, he, him and I am playing Flint who also goes by he, him. 44 00:02:09,439 --> 00:02:10,960 And Kyle Claset. 45 00:02:10,960 --> 00:02:14,960 Hey, yo, hey, him and I'm going to be playing Voronox, also he, him. 46 00:02:20,159 --> 00:02:23,840 Kyle's here and it's really exciting, even though is he a regular cast member? 47 00:02:23,840 --> 00:02:26,240 Maybe we tried to make him come to the gook egg. 48 00:02:26,240 --> 00:02:29,280 There's only one place you can find out if I'm a regular cast member. 49 00:02:29,280 --> 00:02:30,480 Russ, where is that? 50 00:02:30,480 --> 00:02:34,480 Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast, where Kyle pops up in all the things, 51 00:02:34,480 --> 00:02:36,000 like Dumbgeons downtime. 52 00:02:36,000 --> 00:02:37,920 He was in a, he was in an interlude. 53 00:02:37,920 --> 00:02:39,040 For an episode he wasn't even in. 54 00:02:39,040 --> 00:02:41,360 For an episode he wasn't even a part of. 55 00:02:41,360 --> 00:02:42,240 I did that. 56 00:02:42,240 --> 00:02:44,160 Had a different guest star entirely. 57 00:02:44,879 --> 00:02:48,640 We might time those things to line up, but no, we don't. 58 00:02:48,640 --> 00:02:50,800 Because that's how we roll here. 59 00:02:50,800 --> 00:02:51,840 Who's on the call? 60 00:02:51,840 --> 00:02:53,200 What do we need for tomorrow? 61 00:02:53,760 --> 00:02:57,200 Ah, but when you are a patron, you get an episode dedicated to you. 62 00:02:57,200 --> 00:03:00,080 Like today's patron, Maggie. 63 00:03:00,720 --> 00:03:01,920 Thanks, Maggie. 64 00:03:01,920 --> 00:03:03,360 Oh, Maggie. 65 00:03:03,360 --> 00:03:04,560 Dame Maggie Smith. 66 00:03:04,560 --> 00:03:04,880 Wow. 67 00:03:04,880 --> 00:03:07,760 I never thought that she'd be a patron for our podcast. 68 00:03:07,760 --> 00:03:08,160 Amazing. 69 00:03:08,160 --> 00:03:10,720 And I was going to be singing some Rod Stewart. 70 00:03:10,720 --> 00:03:12,240 Oh, also great. 71 00:03:12,240 --> 00:03:12,880 Oh, yeah. 72 00:03:12,880 --> 00:03:13,760 Also a good choice. 73 00:03:13,760 --> 00:03:14,560 Some Bob Dylan. 74 00:03:14,560 --> 00:03:18,160 Oh, so many famous Maggie's are patrons of ours. 75 00:03:18,160 --> 00:03:19,040 You're our favorite. 76 00:03:19,040 --> 00:03:20,800 But you are our favorite. 77 00:03:20,800 --> 00:03:21,040 100%. 78 00:03:21,040 --> 00:03:22,160 Try it in true. 79 00:03:22,160 --> 00:03:22,960 Thanks, Maggie. 80 00:03:23,600 --> 00:03:26,880 Join us today at Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast. 81 00:03:26,880 --> 00:03:27,760 Just like Maggie. 82 00:03:27,760 --> 00:03:28,800 All the Maggie's. 83 00:03:28,800 --> 00:03:30,560 But this one specifically. 84 00:03:30,560 --> 00:03:31,440 And now, fuck it. 85 00:03:31,440 --> 00:03:32,000 Let's play. 86 00:03:35,040 --> 00:03:38,560 You've just hurled yourself down the brambling bony hill. 87 00:03:38,560 --> 00:03:43,920 Down towards Smiler as he is tearing down on his war machine. 88 00:03:43,920 --> 00:03:50,640 Towards the unsuspecting victims of your upcoming Grand Theft Auto. 89 00:03:51,600 --> 00:03:53,040 You land down at the bottom. 90 00:03:58,480 --> 00:03:59,360 I think that was seven. 91 00:04:00,240 --> 00:04:00,720 Maybe. 92 00:04:00,720 --> 00:04:01,120 We'll see. 93 00:04:01,840 --> 00:04:07,120 And you find yourselves in these skeletal bushes down off the side of the road. 94 00:04:07,760 --> 00:04:08,640 Quote unquote. 95 00:04:09,360 --> 00:04:14,800 As Smiler tears out into the center to flag down this oncoming envoy. 96 00:04:14,800 --> 00:04:16,160 Which is of one. 97 00:04:17,040 --> 00:04:17,759 Which one did you want? 98 00:04:17,759 --> 00:04:18,639 The Demon Grinder? 99 00:04:18,639 --> 00:04:19,600 Yeah. 100 00:04:19,680 --> 00:04:21,040 One Demon Grinder. 101 00:04:21,040 --> 00:04:27,680 This huge war machine with these massive bony jawed teeth that come off the front of it. 102 00:04:27,680 --> 00:04:32,160 You can see that there is a huge cab and these razor sharp wheels. 103 00:04:32,160 --> 00:04:34,240 Three sets of them all along it. 104 00:04:34,240 --> 00:04:38,800 Hanging off the back is this pivoting swinging wrecking ball. 105 00:04:38,800 --> 00:04:46,640 Alongside them are three that appear very similar to the one that Smiler is riding. 106 00:04:46,640 --> 00:04:48,400 Called Devil's Ride. 107 00:04:48,480 --> 00:04:53,360 More motorcycle ass can hold a couple people or a couple individuals. 108 00:04:54,080 --> 00:04:57,200 And they are slowing down as they are proceeding to Smiler. 109 00:04:57,200 --> 00:04:58,400 Who you hear is just waving. 110 00:04:58,400 --> 00:05:00,560 Hey everybody just come on over. 111 00:05:00,560 --> 00:05:01,840 I just got something to tell you. 112 00:05:01,840 --> 00:05:03,760 Come on just come in close. 113 00:05:04,320 --> 00:05:11,920 So as they are slowing and the engines are still revving quite heavily. 114 00:05:12,560 --> 00:05:15,680 You see a couple red caps hop off the two. 115 00:05:16,560 --> 00:05:19,600 Two of the motorcycles are making their way over to Smiler. 116 00:05:21,439 --> 00:05:26,240 What if some of you try to sneak around the back of the machine? 117 00:05:26,959 --> 00:05:31,040 And I can try to take these red caps out with my arrows. 118 00:05:31,040 --> 00:05:32,000 Anyone else have a bow? 119 00:05:32,720 --> 00:05:38,399 I was thinking I could just like look through the machine and see how many are in there. 120 00:05:38,399 --> 00:05:39,759 Fuck yeah do that Lipsinki. 121 00:05:39,759 --> 00:05:42,319 So I'm going to use my ghostly gaze. 122 00:05:42,399 --> 00:05:45,519 I can see through solid objects with a dark vision. 123 00:05:45,519 --> 00:05:50,319 I just want to see how many folks are inside that machine that were. 124 00:05:50,319 --> 00:05:52,159 Just so we know what we're dealing with. 125 00:05:52,159 --> 00:05:53,920 That is such a great idea. 126 00:05:53,920 --> 00:05:57,920 Okay you're looking inside the large one. 127 00:05:57,920 --> 00:06:02,959 On the outside there are three red caps piloting the smaller ones. 128 00:06:02,959 --> 00:06:07,759 On the back there are these they look very similar to the red caps. 129 00:06:07,759 --> 00:06:10,800 But it's like their cap has like melted to their face. 130 00:06:10,800 --> 00:06:14,800 And their eyes are just always open and they have these jagged teeth. 131 00:06:14,800 --> 00:06:19,439 And they're like spinning and twirling this sharp side blade in their hand. 132 00:06:22,400 --> 00:06:27,680 They're spinning and twirling their on fire batons as if they are pretty cool. 133 00:06:27,680 --> 00:06:31,120 And there's one who's like playing the devil sticks as he's doing his thing. 134 00:06:31,120 --> 00:06:34,480 Exactly you look through the war machine. 135 00:06:34,480 --> 00:06:36,960 Which is a really cool thing that I didn't know you could do. 136 00:06:36,960 --> 00:06:38,560 But now you're doing it it's amazing. 137 00:06:39,360 --> 00:06:41,519 Piloting one of those is another red cap. 138 00:06:42,240 --> 00:06:51,439 There are three other of the of the like the weird looking red cappy type folks. 139 00:06:51,439 --> 00:06:54,879 And then inside like crammed into it is this. 140 00:06:57,120 --> 00:06:58,800 Make a roll. 141 00:07:00,720 --> 00:07:01,279 Just dinner. 142 00:07:05,120 --> 00:07:05,680 Cinnamon. 143 00:07:06,400 --> 00:07:07,040 What are you looking for? 144 00:07:07,040 --> 00:07:13,600 Probably like either history or I guess nature would be relevant to you. 145 00:07:13,600 --> 00:07:17,040 Because you spent a lot of time in really gross and yucky places. 146 00:07:17,040 --> 00:07:19,759 So nature is a skewed kind of perspective to you. 147 00:07:20,800 --> 00:07:24,000 I mean they're both plus two so whatev twenty. 148 00:07:24,000 --> 00:07:31,120 You look inside and you see what you could describe as a flesh golem creature. 149 00:07:31,759 --> 00:07:35,120 It is a large creature. 150 00:07:35,120 --> 00:07:39,680 It takes it's like hunched over inside the back of this vehicle. 151 00:07:39,680 --> 00:07:44,639 It's stitched together of different body parts from devils and demons. 152 00:07:44,639 --> 00:07:48,959 And like there's these weird tentacles that kind of come off one side of it. 153 00:07:48,959 --> 00:07:53,199 It's got like this droops like beaten up kind of face to it. 154 00:07:54,480 --> 00:07:59,680 And it's rocking back and forth inside this large machine. 155 00:08:00,240 --> 00:08:01,120 Can we get a total? 156 00:08:01,840 --> 00:08:03,280 So 11 total. 157 00:08:04,000 --> 00:08:04,720 That's not eight. 158 00:08:07,120 --> 00:08:08,879 Well he said there'd be eight in the big one. 159 00:08:08,879 --> 00:08:09,519 It's true. 160 00:08:09,519 --> 00:08:11,120 So really there's five in the big one. 161 00:08:11,120 --> 00:08:13,199 Yeah I was going to say there's only five in the big one. 162 00:08:13,920 --> 00:08:16,160 So really we're fine. 163 00:08:16,160 --> 00:08:16,800 We'll be fine. 164 00:08:17,759 --> 00:08:19,199 But there's now two there. 165 00:08:19,199 --> 00:08:20,319 He's flagged two down. 166 00:08:21,920 --> 00:08:23,280 Well there's one big machine. 167 00:08:23,280 --> 00:08:23,840 Yeah. 168 00:08:23,840 --> 00:08:25,840 There are three motorcycle machines. 169 00:08:25,840 --> 00:08:26,800 Oh I getcha. 170 00:08:27,680 --> 00:08:31,920 Plus I thought sorry I thought they were on like the outside of the machine. 171 00:08:31,920 --> 00:08:32,720 Kind of like on the. 172 00:08:33,759 --> 00:08:36,320 No so there are four vehicles. 173 00:08:36,320 --> 00:08:39,759 Four potential stealing machines. 174 00:08:39,759 --> 00:08:43,120 Machines to be stolen other than Smilers. 175 00:08:43,120 --> 00:08:43,620 Gotcha. 176 00:08:44,960 --> 00:08:47,360 Guys I've got good news and bad news. 177 00:08:47,360 --> 00:08:48,159 Which do you want? 178 00:08:49,680 --> 00:08:50,960 Okay so the good news. 179 00:08:50,960 --> 00:08:51,840 I'm just going to. 180 00:08:51,840 --> 00:08:56,399 Okay so the good news there's only five inside there. 181 00:08:56,720 --> 00:08:57,600 That's positive. 182 00:08:57,600 --> 00:08:58,720 So that is good news. 183 00:08:58,720 --> 00:08:59,360 That's good news. 184 00:08:59,360 --> 00:09:03,439 I mean the bad news is that one of them is like a flesh golem. 185 00:09:04,000 --> 00:09:08,879 So it's basically the most disgusting thing you've probably ever seen. 186 00:09:08,879 --> 00:09:12,159 I mean maybe not you Grancis because I know you saw some shit down in the. 187 00:09:12,159 --> 00:09:14,000 I've been a flesh golem once. 188 00:09:14,000 --> 00:09:15,840 Yeah it's kind of piecing. 189 00:09:15,840 --> 00:09:22,319 It's gross and I am going to warn you it probably smells very bad. 190 00:09:22,319 --> 00:09:25,679 Yeah like eggs and watermelon. 191 00:09:27,360 --> 00:09:30,240 Well I mean. 192 00:09:30,240 --> 00:09:30,740 Anyway. 193 00:09:32,319 --> 00:09:34,799 Out of everything it could smell bad those are two foods. 194 00:09:36,240 --> 00:09:38,480 I'm just saying okay. 195 00:09:39,360 --> 00:09:41,919 Combined wait I don't want to know why am I asking. 196 00:09:41,919 --> 00:09:44,240 No let's stay focused people. 197 00:09:44,240 --> 00:09:48,720 But I still love your plan like you like we should sneak up and then. 198 00:09:50,240 --> 00:09:53,039 What are the points of egress into this machine Russ? 199 00:09:53,039 --> 00:09:56,079 I'm picturing a tank but you have not said that. 200 00:09:56,160 --> 00:09:57,280 No I haven't said that. 201 00:09:58,879 --> 00:10:00,160 It's like a tank. 202 00:10:00,160 --> 00:10:01,200 It's like a tank. 203 00:10:01,200 --> 00:10:04,000 So there is one on top there appears. 204 00:10:06,320 --> 00:10:08,639 You haven't really gone around the back. 205 00:10:08,639 --> 00:10:09,360 Maybe you have. 206 00:10:09,920 --> 00:10:11,440 You would be able to see straight through. 207 00:10:11,440 --> 00:10:12,240 It's all good. 208 00:10:12,240 --> 00:10:16,000 There appears to be an entrance not directly out the back because that's where the 209 00:10:16,000 --> 00:10:21,520 swinging ball is but like often to the side near the back there is a larger door. 210 00:10:21,520 --> 00:10:25,600 So there's one door at the very back and then one from the top. 211 00:10:25,600 --> 00:10:31,120 Well whatever my plan is I know that I can offer a little bit of help. 212 00:10:31,120 --> 00:10:34,720 So I'm going to cast I'm going to go ahead and get us set up with bless. 213 00:10:36,080 --> 00:10:39,600 At a how many people I need to bless right now. 214 00:10:40,879 --> 00:10:43,519 Six six players. 215 00:10:43,519 --> 00:10:47,759 I'm just picturing like you get a bless you get a bless you get a bless. 216 00:10:47,759 --> 00:10:49,360 That's exactly it you nailed it. 217 00:10:49,360 --> 00:10:51,920 Yeah there's six player characters plus Donnie. 218 00:10:53,600 --> 00:10:55,040 All right so let me do. 219 00:10:55,039 --> 00:11:00,639 Fifth level that should get me everybody in our group now has bless. 220 00:11:01,839 --> 00:11:02,480 What does that do? 221 00:11:02,480 --> 00:11:03,519 It's real good. 222 00:11:03,519 --> 00:11:08,240 Whenever you make an attack or a saving throw before the spell ends which is a minute long 223 00:11:08,240 --> 00:11:11,519 you can add a d4 to the rolled attack or saving throw. 224 00:11:12,480 --> 00:11:13,679 Nice yes. 225 00:11:15,759 --> 00:11:22,799 All right I've got ranged attacks I can stay here take care of some a-holes on the outside 226 00:11:23,520 --> 00:11:30,720 if some heavy hitters want to go in and you know I mean they're kind of trapped in there right. 227 00:11:31,600 --> 00:11:33,200 What if you threw fire in there? 228 00:11:33,200 --> 00:11:34,320 We could do that. 229 00:11:34,320 --> 00:11:36,160 Just saying get creative with it. 230 00:11:36,160 --> 00:11:39,520 Oh I've got an idea I've got this fun little thing I can at least 231 00:11:39,520 --> 00:11:46,000 eliminate one of their points of egress so if there's a door I've got this nifty little 232 00:11:46,000 --> 00:11:50,960 rod and I pull out an immovable rod click it stays in space just like we just put that 233 00:11:50,960 --> 00:11:53,280 in front of it then they have only one way to go out. 234 00:11:53,280 --> 00:11:54,240 I like it let's do that. 235 00:11:55,120 --> 00:12:00,800 I'm not sneaky as we found out earlier would somebody be more would somebody want to. 236 00:12:00,800 --> 00:12:04,800 I can do this it's a press here or press. 237 00:12:04,800 --> 00:12:09,360 Yeah just click the end of it and leave it where you want it click the end and then 238 00:12:10,080 --> 00:12:10,960 let go. 239 00:12:10,960 --> 00:12:12,720 And they cannot pass through? 240 00:12:12,720 --> 00:12:18,800 Well it's immovable so nothing's nothing's moving it unless you again. 241 00:12:19,440 --> 00:12:21,760 Wait does the door swing in or out? 242 00:12:21,760 --> 00:12:23,120 It is magic right? 243 00:12:24,240 --> 00:12:27,520 I do not generally like magic but this this is what. 244 00:12:28,560 --> 00:12:30,720 I don't know Francis. 245 00:12:30,720 --> 00:12:35,360 It's valid because if it swings in and you put a bar in front of it then they're just going to. 246 00:12:36,480 --> 00:12:40,800 I know but then they cannot pass through where this is. 247 00:12:42,000 --> 00:12:43,680 Yes it creates a door that is not there. 248 00:12:43,680 --> 00:12:47,680 Has there ever been a vehicle where the door swings in that isn't a hatch at the top? 249 00:12:47,680 --> 00:12:54,080 It's quite a small area in there they're pretty jammed in so if it pulled in it'd be I mean I 250 00:12:54,080 --> 00:12:57,120 don't know the design standards here or what sort but it. 251 00:12:57,120 --> 00:13:02,240 Look I'm just trying to I'm just trying to just solve for problems that don't exist. 252 00:13:02,240 --> 00:13:06,240 Better yet instead of instead of putting it in front of the door 253 00:13:06,240 --> 00:13:09,840 we could put it behind one or in front of one of their wheels and then they won't be 254 00:13:09,840 --> 00:13:12,480 able to drive off if they get the urge to do so. 255 00:13:12,480 --> 00:13:14,240 Oh that's a good idea too. 256 00:13:14,320 --> 00:13:18,480 Now that's that's how you rose through the ranks. 257 00:13:18,480 --> 00:13:22,960 That's why you became my mentor and best friend because you're so smart. 258 00:13:22,960 --> 00:13:27,600 I am sorry I was looking at this fun thing where do you want me to place it? 259 00:13:27,600 --> 00:13:29,200 On on the door. 260 00:13:29,200 --> 00:13:33,120 No we're changing that put it put it in front of one of their wheels so if they 261 00:13:33,120 --> 00:13:37,680 try to move forward they won't be able to now if they move back that's a different story but. 262 00:13:37,680 --> 00:13:41,440 Maybe it's not equipped with a reverse function you're always moving forward in hell. 263 00:13:41,920 --> 00:13:43,680 And then you'll do U-turns. 264 00:13:43,680 --> 00:13:47,920 Yeah yeah constant U-turns left turns when it's least convenient for anybody else. 265 00:13:47,920 --> 00:13:49,360 Okay we'll do this now. 266 00:13:49,360 --> 00:13:49,680 Okay. 267 00:13:49,680 --> 00:13:55,360 And Night Hunter sneaks off to go around because obviously you can't just beeline it for the 268 00:13:55,360 --> 00:13:56,400 front there are other. 269 00:13:56,400 --> 00:13:59,360 There are other entities and creatures uh observing the front. 270 00:13:59,360 --> 00:14:02,080 Yeah so they're gonna just try to be super sneaky. 271 00:14:02,080 --> 00:14:03,040 Okay so Night Hunter. 272 00:14:05,120 --> 00:14:06,160 Sneaking around. 273 00:14:06,160 --> 00:14:08,720 Roll me a sneak check a stealth check. 274 00:14:09,760 --> 00:14:10,480 Oh fuck me. 275 00:14:11,520 --> 00:14:14,480 Uh but then I can add uh oh hold on hold on. 276 00:14:14,480 --> 00:14:15,520 You can add a bless thing. 277 00:14:16,160 --> 00:14:17,920 I can add a bless thing. 278 00:14:17,920 --> 00:14:19,040 Which is plus D4. 279 00:14:19,600 --> 00:14:22,480 All right that was that's a 12. 280 00:14:22,480 --> 00:14:26,240 A 12 is not that bad it's hell there's a lot of things happening in hell. 281 00:14:27,360 --> 00:14:29,520 I suppose these machines are like. 282 00:14:31,360 --> 00:14:35,040 Oh yeah they they scream with the power of soul uh. 283 00:14:35,040 --> 00:14:39,280 Oh well fantastic then under the cover of soul screams I fly. 284 00:14:40,240 --> 00:14:44,159 You're sneaking around to one of the rear wheels presumably. 285 00:14:44,159 --> 00:14:45,439 Yeah I'm not gonna put it. 286 00:14:46,639 --> 00:14:51,039 Oh here we go I'm not actually gonna place it in front of their front tires. 287 00:14:51,039 --> 00:14:54,559 I'm going to place it in front of one of their back tires. 288 00:14:54,559 --> 00:14:58,319 That way if they try to go forward they can't and if they try to reverse they can't. 289 00:14:59,919 --> 00:15:01,919 Yeah because it's stuck between the wheels. 290 00:15:02,799 --> 00:15:06,079 Thinking thinking all right uh so Night Hunter's there. 291 00:15:06,079 --> 00:15:08,879 Where do does everybody else want to be? 292 00:15:09,279 --> 00:15:15,039 As far as using like clock directions which one has the easiest uh ingress? 293 00:15:15,039 --> 00:15:18,959 Like getting there quick it's like three o'clock nine o'clock. 294 00:15:18,959 --> 00:15:20,959 They're all at 12 o'clock because we're back in a bush. 295 00:15:23,279 --> 00:15:26,079 So are you looking for which door to run to? 296 00:15:26,079 --> 00:15:27,199 Yeah that's what I thought. 297 00:15:27,199 --> 00:15:29,839 No just to run up to that in general. 298 00:15:29,839 --> 00:15:31,199 Let's say eight o'clock. 299 00:15:31,199 --> 00:15:37,120 Everybody give me a little like action montage description of you getting into position. 300 00:15:37,919 --> 00:15:43,759 Uh okay so Night Hunter you're gonna go place the uh the immovable rod uh the rear tires 301 00:15:43,759 --> 00:15:45,679 so that if they back up move forward. 302 00:15:45,679 --> 00:15:46,399 Exactly. 303 00:15:46,399 --> 00:15:49,679 Okay uh Vorunax and Lipsinkie where are you gonna be? 304 00:15:49,679 --> 00:15:53,759 Sneaking up to the left hand side uh I look back at Lipsinkie. 305 00:15:53,759 --> 00:15:58,639 Not sure exactly because we haven't gotten too many chances to work with each other yet. 306 00:15:58,639 --> 00:16:02,879 But uh I just start moving because I'm used to and then I look back at Lipsinkie like. 307 00:16:03,519 --> 00:16:07,039 Yeah and big thumbs up and I think what Lipsinkie's gonna do is use sharpie 308 00:16:07,039 --> 00:16:11,120 because I never I haven't used sharpie in a long time but sharpie can actually be used 309 00:16:11,120 --> 00:16:18,159 like essentially as a grappling hook from the bracer so I'm gonna do that so that I can um get 310 00:16:18,159 --> 00:16:24,480 up onto the top because I do want to open that hatch and do something down into them. 311 00:16:24,480 --> 00:16:28,000 That seems like okay you know they're kind of trapped in there. 312 00:16:28,879 --> 00:16:31,519 Let's like put you just down on top then yeah. 313 00:16:31,519 --> 00:16:36,000 So so that's my plan is just like grapple my way up there. 314 00:16:36,960 --> 00:16:40,159 Step one she hasn't figured out what step two is yet but. 315 00:16:40,159 --> 00:16:42,240 Yeah well it will present itself to her. 316 00:16:42,240 --> 00:16:49,440 Exactly love it uh Thea and Flint from the side uh maybe a little game plan for each of 317 00:16:49,440 --> 00:16:50,240 yourselves. 318 00:16:50,240 --> 00:16:55,360 Uh well Thea I think has already given her spiel about like I'm gonna stay here. 319 00:16:55,360 --> 00:16:59,840 And then Grantz starts to move like as Vorunax and Lipsinkie and then like start 320 00:16:59,840 --> 00:17:03,919 to move toward the thing and she like straight up grabs him by the scruff of the 321 00:17:03,920 --> 00:17:08,240 back of his collar neck and is like you sit down you stay here with me. 322 00:17:09,360 --> 00:17:11,759 Oh okay uh yeah yeah I'll stay here. 323 00:17:11,759 --> 00:17:12,560 Okay we're gonna try to. 324 00:17:12,560 --> 00:17:14,960 Flint's gonna stay here too with us keep us company. 325 00:17:16,240 --> 00:17:16,720 Well no. 326 00:17:18,320 --> 00:17:20,880 Flint is gonna go hit people really hard. 327 00:17:20,880 --> 00:17:22,240 All right you still do that do you? 328 00:17:25,680 --> 00:17:26,400 Yes he does. 329 00:17:28,000 --> 00:17:30,880 I mean I'm already down by the vehicle I don't I don't know. 330 00:17:31,040 --> 00:17:36,480 Rest one in the scene before you go. 331 00:17:36,480 --> 00:17:36,800 That's cool. 332 00:17:36,800 --> 00:17:37,520 He's already gone. 333 00:17:37,520 --> 00:17:38,720 He's already gone he's already left. 334 00:17:38,720 --> 00:17:40,960 He didn't even talk to you Grantz is worried about you. 335 00:17:40,960 --> 00:17:42,160 He didn't even say goodbye. 336 00:17:42,160 --> 00:17:48,080 Okay we need what we need to do is we need to quietly try to take out some of these. 337 00:17:48,080 --> 00:17:49,200 Why are you talking so loud? 338 00:17:50,080 --> 00:17:50,720 I'm not. 339 00:17:52,160 --> 00:17:52,400 You're. 340 00:17:57,280 --> 00:18:00,400 My full plan is you see those two that are walking up to Smiler. 341 00:18:00,880 --> 00:18:05,280 I want all this chaos to happen behind their backs so that they don't turn around. 342 00:18:06,480 --> 00:18:06,800 Okay. 343 00:18:06,800 --> 00:18:07,360 We're gonna kill. 344 00:18:08,160 --> 00:18:09,840 Okay okay. 345 00:18:09,840 --> 00:18:10,880 Okay okay. 346 00:18:10,880 --> 00:18:15,440 Okay sorry hell does weird things to your vocal cords it makes them really 347 00:18:15,440 --> 00:18:17,200 clear and then they drift back out. 348 00:18:17,200 --> 00:18:29,040 I don't like it quiet let's just not talk anymore. 349 00:18:30,880 --> 00:18:42,720 As everybody gets into position and readies themselves as best they can 350 00:18:42,720 --> 00:18:48,640 Smiler's kind of watching everything drawing the attention back towards himself from 351 00:18:48,640 --> 00:18:54,000 the redcaps who are in front of him as the random noises are made so that hopefully 352 00:18:54,000 --> 00:18:57,040 you make it to your position as smoothly as possible. 353 00:18:57,519 --> 00:19:02,879 Um and then yes well and then she says to him she says now. 354 00:19:02,879 --> 00:19:14,960 As she hears Smiler yell now she will let loose an eldritch blast so a beam of this time 355 00:19:14,960 --> 00:19:24,000 red crackling energy streaks towards these creatures four beams crackle out from her 356 00:19:24,000 --> 00:19:32,079 hands and as she aims for the four dudes on the cool motorcycles. 357 00:19:32,079 --> 00:19:34,880 We're trying to disrupt them on the motorbikes. 358 00:19:34,880 --> 00:19:35,920 Indeed. 359 00:19:35,920 --> 00:19:38,240 All right awesome give me some rolls. 360 00:19:38,880 --> 00:19:44,720 So that's five damage for the first four for the second three for the third 361 00:19:44,720 --> 00:19:49,200 who wants to guess what the next one's gonna be oh it's a four. 362 00:19:49,759 --> 00:19:59,519 Five four three two one this sucks and then that's right I remember that I've got multiple actions. 363 00:20:02,000 --> 00:20:08,160 She is going to take her oath bow but she's not gonna whisper to it she's just gonna 364 00:20:09,279 --> 00:20:15,360 use it as a bow that's possible right yeah yeah I don't have to you don't get the bonus 365 00:20:15,360 --> 00:20:19,200 that it gives when you do the whisper but yeah you just use it as a bow right. 366 00:20:19,200 --> 00:20:28,800 The bonus huh uh that's a 25 yeah absolutely six plus two okay and that one is going for 367 00:20:28,800 --> 00:20:34,960 the one that is closest to the bushes okay so yeah one of the red caps who is talking 368 00:20:34,960 --> 00:20:40,160 to Smiler at this time oh sure yes the above the bushes 369 00:20:40,160 --> 00:20:51,120 which is for elders blast ring out and crackling energy through the air and knocks all of these 370 00:20:51,120 --> 00:20:57,600 creatures off of the devil's ride that they're on they're blasted back and off a arrow zips 371 00:20:57,600 --> 00:21:02,960 through the air towards one of them and impales in its shoulder lets out just this hideous 372 00:21:03,519 --> 00:21:06,800 scream as it reaches for its scythe. 373 00:21:07,359 --> 00:21:13,839 Am I able to like rip open one of these doors and hop in this tank sure yeah absolutely let's do it 374 00:21:13,839 --> 00:21:19,200 okay you tear open the door it sticks a little bit it's a little awkward at first but then 375 00:21:19,200 --> 00:21:23,200 then it rips open you gotta you gotta give it like an up and an open at the same time 376 00:21:23,200 --> 00:21:30,159 and as you open it staring straight at you is this huge flesh golem as was described by 377 00:21:30,960 --> 00:21:36,800 it's got these now that it looks it starts to slowly look up at you and opens its mouth 378 00:21:36,800 --> 00:21:42,400 and like the jaw hangs loose and it's got these sharp teeth and like this tentacle begins 379 00:21:42,400 --> 00:21:48,080 to move out towards you to try and grab on to you what do you do uh i am going to uh attack 380 00:21:48,080 --> 00:21:53,360 that tentacle as it tries to come at me what are you hitting it with uh probably my battle 381 00:21:53,840 --> 00:22:02,000 axe swings out how big is the interior of this if we were to go inside of it would our 382 00:22:02,800 --> 00:22:08,640 like movements be impeded at all like flint's at the door yes but i'm just wondering if he 383 00:22:08,640 --> 00:22:14,880 were to step inside would he have room to swing an axe uh yeah it's pretty roomy y'all 384 00:22:14,880 --> 00:22:21,200 would i be better served to go like the long sword though probably yeah coming up and over 385 00:22:21,200 --> 00:22:28,799 is gonna be an issue like you know a side swipe um would be would be more advantageous 386 00:22:28,799 --> 00:22:34,080 because of this large creature in there it is slightly cramped but you would imagine that 387 00:22:34,080 --> 00:22:40,240 that it's it's pretty spacious for normal sized individuals well we'll do uh moist tongue 388 00:22:40,240 --> 00:22:47,680 long sword then been so long i know moist and 389 00:22:50,000 --> 00:22:57,120 and i'll deal some damage with that bad boy so i have three attacks per action russ okay 38 390 00:22:57,120 --> 00:23:06,319 yes how much of that's cold all of the 2d6 so 18 of it 30 is a 20 is not 20 391 00:23:07,039 --> 00:23:18,720 my math is math is hard okay okay yeah 38 yeah 18 18 of it's cold the cold begins to crystallize 392 00:23:18,720 --> 00:23:24,639 the skin but it doesn't not in the same way that you were used to you are now blocking the 393 00:23:24,639 --> 00:23:30,079 door essentially unless you choose to move uh i'll probably like make sure i get one or two steps 394 00:23:30,079 --> 00:23:36,799 into this thing flint steps in and to the side night hunter uh so you are i guess you are placing 395 00:23:36,799 --> 00:23:43,279 the immovable rod that is your that is your mode in this one yes can i place it and then 396 00:23:44,240 --> 00:23:50,240 sneak up the front of the yeah the machine okay i want to do that okay yeah you uh place the 397 00:23:50,240 --> 00:23:55,599 immovable rod you push the button as described doesn't seem to be able to move you try and 398 00:23:55,600 --> 00:24:01,600 give it a little shimmy uh i'm like fantastic technology has advertised uh and then you move 399 00:24:01,600 --> 00:24:06,000 up to the front of the machine where you see three of these mad caps trying to like 400 00:24:07,360 --> 00:24:12,480 climb back up to their feet um and then the red cap scrambling to get their weapons 401 00:24:12,480 --> 00:24:20,000 in front of them Vorunax seeing as flint and lip sync he have the tank going down i am going 402 00:24:20,079 --> 00:24:28,160 to run up to the the guy in the that's standing next to the left motorcycle left most motorcycle 403 00:24:28,160 --> 00:24:32,960 yep i'm gonna run up drawing my uh my sword of vengeance and i'm going to 404 00:24:33,759 --> 00:24:39,599 exclaim out in the name of good you will die today and i'm gonna give an attack 405 00:24:40,480 --> 00:24:44,960 love it uh so yeah like everybody else we can just roll some damage for this one 406 00:24:45,680 --> 00:24:53,200 all right so that is uh 11 slashing magical slashing damage and i'm going to burn a divine 407 00:24:53,200 --> 00:24:59,920 smite okay and do 2d8 extra of radiant and damage nine radiant damage on top of that 408 00:24:59,920 --> 00:25:11,440 oh 20 in total and is it a fiend it is a small fae fae okay i mean i didn't tell you 409 00:25:11,440 --> 00:25:18,480 what it was it's not a fiend though yeah you take a huge chunk into it and because it's it's like 410 00:25:19,279 --> 00:25:26,000 prone you as you get closer you see that the boots on it have this huge like hooked uh blade 411 00:25:26,000 --> 00:25:33,519 on them um but you cut down into it and let's out a scry scry lets out a cry uh it looks 412 00:25:34,160 --> 00:25:41,599 it's a scream cry and like a false limp uh you like you managed to like stab through the heart 413 00:25:41,599 --> 00:25:48,400 of this thing uh and and shut this one down it's dead it's dead oh good then i'm going to 414 00:25:48,400 --> 00:25:53,519 use the rest of my movement to move up to the middle one right behind the gray one and uh do 415 00:25:53,519 --> 00:26:01,519 another attack awesome so that's going to be 13 magical slashing damage and 13 radiant damage 416 00:26:01,519 --> 00:26:05,599 again because of its prone position and your ability to sneak up on it before it has a chance 417 00:26:05,599 --> 00:26:14,799 to um guard itself uh you can kill this creature as you see murderously and another for you 418 00:26:14,799 --> 00:26:24,240 in the name of good impale he's over there like doing good feels so good i'm enjoying this 419 00:26:24,240 --> 00:26:29,119 fae is concerned just watching from the bushes like oh no yeah this is not this is not what 420 00:26:29,120 --> 00:26:34,880 we had in mind but did you kill that other one too yeah he's killed too we go to lip sinky now 421 00:26:34,880 --> 00:26:42,160 so when i lodged sharpie in there as a grappling hook i would like to submit that i can then pull 422 00:26:42,160 --> 00:26:49,280 because there is a whole thing about using it for attacks to pull that lid off okay yeah and 423 00:26:49,280 --> 00:26:56,720 once i do that luckily i noticed my friend uh flint go in there so i won't do the thing 424 00:26:56,720 --> 00:27:05,759 that i was originally going to do but instead um i think i will just eldritch blast because that 425 00:27:05,759 --> 00:27:13,600 does four beams which i'll do the extra one into big grosso does that make sense yeah big 426 00:27:13,600 --> 00:27:26,960 grosso you know big grosso um so that is damn uh so two nines a four and a three damn the 427 00:27:26,960 --> 00:27:35,120 interior of this this tank creates uh lights up with the the beams coming from your eldritch 428 00:27:35,120 --> 00:27:43,120 blast uh flint they like zip by you and over your shoulders um and strike into this huge 429 00:27:43,120 --> 00:27:49,280 creature in front of you who is like blown back into the side and the entire thing rocks 430 00:27:49,280 --> 00:27:56,240 lip sinky make a dexterity saving throw please not great do i still have that 431 00:27:56,240 --> 00:28:01,280 bless from before you still have a d4 for bless yep no that's good for a minute so that's 432 00:28:01,279 --> 00:28:09,359 gonna put me at a 12 your foot slips and you fall off the side and down towards one of these 433 00:28:09,359 --> 00:28:16,399 razor sharp blades okay i'm still holding no i'm not that's a lie i was gonna say i'm still 434 00:28:16,399 --> 00:28:22,480 holding on to sharpie but sharpie threw a lid off so sharpie is no longer attached to the 435 00:28:22,480 --> 00:28:28,960 machine damn it so you're gonna like land on your side and you're gonna it's gonna cut deep 436 00:28:28,960 --> 00:28:32,960 into you and you're gonna take eight slashing damage landing on this tire 437 00:28:32,960 --> 00:28:41,600 right it's not tire this razor blade hey Grancis see it's been a while what what should i do 438 00:28:42,400 --> 00:28:47,120 uh you should hit them with a spell but not like one of your awesome spells that you like 439 00:28:47,120 --> 00:28:52,000 save those for orcas but like hit them with like a like a mediocre spell oh do we think 440 00:28:52,000 --> 00:28:58,079 we're gonna fight orcas like next i don't i don't know what if there's no time to 441 00:28:58,079 --> 00:29:05,359 rest in between now and then well yeah i know i get it i haven't had a time to to to rest 442 00:29:05,359 --> 00:29:11,039 in quite a while uh what about call lightning does that seem like it would be pretty cool 443 00:29:11,039 --> 00:29:18,240 i mean yeah sure maybe okay cool a storm cloud begins to appear uh as he is oh that's a 444 00:29:18,240 --> 00:29:22,480 that's a duration i was like oh shit casting time 10 minutes god damn was this feinstein 445 00:29:23,360 --> 00:29:29,360 but no it's casting time what is the point one action duration 10 minutes a storm cloud appears 446 00:29:29,360 --> 00:29:34,160 above the machine uh in the shape of a cylinder 10 feet tall 60 foot radius centered on the 447 00:29:34,160 --> 00:29:38,480 point i could see uh when cast i choose a point i can see in the cloud a bolt of 448 00:29:38,480 --> 00:29:41,519 lighting flashes down to the cloud each creature within five feet at that point must 449 00:29:41,519 --> 00:29:48,160 make a dexterity saving throw uh hey maybe instead of over top of that go over top of 450 00:29:48,160 --> 00:29:51,839 the guys on the motorcycles oh yeah that's probably a really good idea just to the left 451 00:29:51,840 --> 00:29:58,080 a little bit oh but pharax is there oh fuck it he'll be okay yeah he'll probably position 452 00:29:58,080 --> 00:30:02,720 it above the two that are near a smiler yeah fuck it they're gonna take it three d10 453 00:30:02,720 --> 00:30:14,240 you're a little 3d10 yeah you want me to roll that sure three eight five uh 16 uh the two 454 00:30:14,240 --> 00:30:18,960 that are near a smiler the two red caps uh are finally back up to their feet and they 455 00:30:18,960 --> 00:30:24,319 hold up their size and it connects with this lightning blast that like riddles down through 456 00:30:24,319 --> 00:30:31,039 their body and you can see their skeleton like's fixing in and out um and it stops 457 00:30:31,039 --> 00:30:36,160 and there's smoke coming up from their the top of their heads and they just fall over 458 00:30:36,960 --> 00:30:42,000 see like riding a bike oh i felt good felt good no now we got this cool storm action 459 00:30:42,960 --> 00:30:50,960 okay we're back up to the top uh smiler's gonna have a turn uh he's going to hop on his vehicle 460 00:30:51,839 --> 00:30:57,359 um and it appears that he is driving away 461 00:31:04,160 --> 00:31:09,759 really nice to see you have fun in your vehicles and he tears off 462 00:31:12,960 --> 00:31:19,119 you hey everybody it's me your dungeon master Russ More i i've just recorded several of 463 00:31:19,119 --> 00:31:23,279 these middles and i keep getting a little retrospective and sappy in them so i 464 00:31:24,480 --> 00:31:28,000 i don't know if that's what we need for this episode it's grand theft war machine 465 00:31:28,720 --> 00:31:35,759 and we're very excited because a couple things you may have noticed some release schedules are 466 00:31:35,759 --> 00:31:40,799 off if you're all cut up you're like hey hey russ i want to know what happens next and we 467 00:31:40,799 --> 00:31:46,960 want to tell you uh world's busy got to make sure that we uh take care of ourselves uh and 468 00:31:46,960 --> 00:31:52,319 we're putting out content as fast as we can but no in the background we are still recording every 469 00:31:52,319 --> 00:31:57,599 tuesday like we do uh and we are working towards some pretty big events that i can't tell you 470 00:31:57,599 --> 00:32:06,079 about but it's very exciting big things are happening things that i didn't expect which is 471 00:32:06,079 --> 00:32:12,240 the case for most of Dumbgeons and Dragons which is why it takes us so long to get places but 472 00:32:12,240 --> 00:32:17,599 we have so much fun and we've got so much coming your way and we want to share it with you i just 473 00:32:17,599 --> 00:32:21,199 can't put them out fast enough so don't worry we are working ahead and planning and making 474 00:32:21,199 --> 00:32:28,399 sure that this is the biggest most epic thing that we're working towards that we've ever done 475 00:32:28,399 --> 00:32:33,519 if you're like hey i am caught up i need more episodes i need to know what's going on you 476 00:32:33,519 --> 00:32:39,519 can come join us on Patreon Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast where i mean we are a a patron 477 00:32:39,519 --> 00:32:45,279 supported as well as advertiser supported but primarily patron supported show that has allowed 478 00:32:45,279 --> 00:32:51,200 us to continue recording my computer just died a few weeks back and i had to go out like same 479 00:32:51,200 --> 00:32:58,319 day and get a new computer which i was only able to do because of our patrons so thank 480 00:32:58,319 --> 00:33:04,720 you Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast whole bunch of content over there like i'm looking 481 00:33:04,720 --> 00:33:10,639 at the list like more than 250 episodes so look at your main feed where there's more than 250 482 00:33:10,639 --> 00:33:15,519 episodes double it that's how much content we've got over there for you which includes 483 00:33:15,519 --> 00:33:22,159 a whole bunch of down times from season two and an entirely original and exclusive podcast 484 00:33:22,159 --> 00:33:27,119 that we've got it we're deep into season four over there i'm pretty sure tom's working 485 00:33:27,120 --> 00:33:31,040 towards the season five but we'll see how it goes you know we're not rushing anything 486 00:33:31,040 --> 00:33:34,960 that's not what we do here so we hope to see you over there in the Patreon community 487 00:33:34,960 --> 00:33:39,120 people are joining the discord every day and we can't wait for you to join us 488 00:33:39,120 --> 00:33:43,360 but we'll get you back to this episode now thank you for listening and thank you for 489 00:33:43,360 --> 00:33:47,600 considering joining us on Patreon you have a great week we'll talk to you soon 490 00:33:50,240 --> 00:33:54,480 is there anyone still alive there are two on the outside that are still alive a red cap 491 00:33:54,480 --> 00:34:01,680 and a mad cap uh there is still the big grotesque thing as well as uh what did i say three mad 492 00:34:01,680 --> 00:34:09,599 caps inside and a red cap yeah uh so four more creature five more creatures inside the vehicle 493 00:34:09,599 --> 00:34:17,199 that are still alive inside the big vehicle uh thea we're back to you all right um thea 494 00:34:17,199 --> 00:34:27,039 is going to eldritch blast the two on the outside twice so they're each going to get two 495 00:34:28,000 --> 00:34:36,399 beams awesome uh my first one is a 19 that will hit second one's a 19 okay third one's 15 496 00:34:37,439 --> 00:34:46,960 got a d4 on bless 15 hits yep oh dear and the next one is an 11 and i'm gonna use that d4 497 00:34:47,519 --> 00:35:00,639 come on what is it oh shoot i think it's 13 13 does not hit ah okay so uh three two two to the 498 00:35:00,639 --> 00:35:05,679 one in the middle and one to the other one on the side more elf blast fires across the 499 00:35:05,679 --> 00:35:11,119 landscape uh two right in front of you Vorunax at the one that you the one that's in front 500 00:35:11,119 --> 00:35:15,759 of the one that you just murdered 11 damage and as they are standing back to their feet 501 00:35:15,760 --> 00:35:21,040 are blasted back again knocked to the ground in varnus you hear them specifically they're like 502 00:35:21,040 --> 00:35:29,280 ah son of bitch god damn it i'm gonna get them uh they don't appear to be dead yet they are like 503 00:35:29,840 --> 00:35:35,520 there's they're being too sassy for you scorch and and burn marks all over their all over 504 00:35:35,520 --> 00:35:42,000 their flesh weirdly it's all thea's name in cursive that's that's right yeah it's a brand 505 00:35:42,000 --> 00:35:47,280 yeah uh the red cap's turn he's going to stand up which is going to take half of its movement which 506 00:35:47,280 --> 00:35:53,199 is only 25 so it's going to take 12 but then uh look around and charge towards you Vorunax 507 00:35:54,000 --> 00:36:00,320 for cool red cap has a multi-attack three attacks with its wicked sickle bring it wicked 508 00:36:00,320 --> 00:36:08,079 sickle uh move a speed yeah like a sticky wicked uh exactly wicked yeah uh first attack uh 10 509 00:36:08,639 --> 00:36:17,279 no second attack 25 that will hit yeah third attack 19 that does not hit okay uh so that's 510 00:36:17,279 --> 00:36:21,360 going to be nine slashing damage from the one that hits you and it comes up it's just like 511 00:36:21,360 --> 00:36:26,639 flailing its sickle and the second one cuts into your arm where there's a little uh clearance 512 00:36:26,639 --> 00:36:32,960 in your armor all right uh let's react with a little hellish rebuke oh that one was on my 513 00:36:32,960 --> 00:36:44,400 list wasn't it it was okay cool beans what happens i he hellishly rebuke yeah yeah i mean 514 00:36:44,400 --> 00:36:49,440 it's pretty self-explanatory i'm just doing it at first level uh okay cast uh hellish rebuke 515 00:36:49,440 --> 00:36:54,720 uh and uh tell me what normally happens uh well the creature must make a dexterity 516 00:36:54,720 --> 00:37:00,960 saving throw if it takes 2d10 fire damage on a failed or half as much on a success dex 517 00:37:00,960 --> 00:37:11,039 save plus a one that's a 15 uh that does not beat my dc of uh of 20 of 1 million ah i was so 518 00:37:11,039 --> 00:37:18,159 close okay dang it so he's gonna take some damage which still happens that'd be 15 fire 519 00:37:18,159 --> 00:37:25,679 damage in total and can you roll me a d6 please i certainly can that's a five okay uh you cast 520 00:37:25,759 --> 00:37:31,919 hellish rebuke flames are burning up all around him uh he he's screaming out in pain and drops 521 00:37:31,919 --> 00:37:41,359 dead but in the remnants of the flame uh five imps pop out of the flames look around and uh 522 00:37:41,359 --> 00:37:49,519 move to charge towards you sweet i'm gonna roll them into initiative they go never ending combat 523 00:37:49,519 --> 00:37:55,199 never ending combat oh god don't do that again yeah that's more of a Patreon game thing russ 524 00:37:55,200 --> 00:38:00,880 stop stealing my thing i will not uh they're gonna go next actually cool so five imps coming 525 00:38:00,880 --> 00:38:07,680 towards you they attack with stings bites in beast form no it's gonna be a sting here we go 526 00:38:07,680 --> 00:38:16,560 let's see if i can beat your ac with one that's a 10 223 oh yes another 10 oh nat 20 527 00:38:18,240 --> 00:38:24,640 which makes 25 and a 9 so that's two uh so the first one you get five piercing damage 528 00:38:24,639 --> 00:38:28,879 please make a constitution saving throw i think you can probably beat it without even rolling 529 00:38:28,879 --> 00:38:35,599 if i remember correctly well i mean i got a nine so you tell me oh you didn't yeah uh so 530 00:38:35,599 --> 00:38:41,679 you also take 10 poison damage uh i'm immune oh wait no i have a resistance against poison 531 00:38:41,679 --> 00:38:45,759 so there'd be only five all right so you're gonna take five poison damage and then you're 532 00:38:45,759 --> 00:38:49,759 gonna take double on the next one so you're gonna take another 10 piercing damage and 533 00:38:49,840 --> 00:38:57,600 another constitution saving throw okay oh 25 that one succeeds uh so you're only gonna take 534 00:38:57,600 --> 00:39:01,760 half so you're gonna take another point 10 poison damage half you're gonna take another 535 00:39:01,760 --> 00:39:07,840 five okay the mad caps inside flint charge towards you there are three of them they're 536 00:39:07,840 --> 00:39:13,520 the ones that look like they the hats have melted into their face i would probably also 537 00:39:13,520 --> 00:39:17,520 be angry if that was my lot they don't look happy i mean you are covered with scabs so 538 00:39:17,519 --> 00:39:24,719 your life is not great either at the moment forgot about that so they each have three 539 00:39:24,719 --> 00:39:33,840 swings with their wicked sickles so i'm gonna roll 320 so that's uh plus so 13 14 14 for 540 00:39:33,840 --> 00:39:45,519 the first one nothing no no one no boy uh 12 13 14 for the second one wow you're rolling my 541 00:39:46,320 --> 00:39:56,239 uh 18 25 11 18 does not hit so the 25 so just one so you're gonna take nine slashing damage like 542 00:39:56,239 --> 00:40:00,880 all of these these three creatures and they're they're small so they're like two or three feet 543 00:40:00,880 --> 00:40:05,679 coming at you just swinging their sickles as quickly as they can towards you uh only one 544 00:40:05,679 --> 00:40:12,400 of them manages to catch skin which catches like an exceptionally scabby part and it just 545 00:40:12,400 --> 00:40:17,519 it really just feels extra bad like it's not a huge amount of damage but yeah just like begins 546 00:40:17,519 --> 00:40:29,119 to positive i hate it yeah it's because it's hell uh okay flint uh well yeah let's uh let's 547 00:40:29,119 --> 00:40:34,480 turn that back around let's turn the beat around uh and we'll uh we'll just we'll attack 548 00:40:34,480 --> 00:40:39,599 all those weird red cap face boys awesome uh so you have three of them in front of you 549 00:40:40,000 --> 00:40:44,480 name them one two and three all right well let's uh let's attack them in that order 550 00:40:45,039 --> 00:40:53,839 all right roll all my d20s uh that's a 24 yep that's the exact same all right 551 00:40:54,719 --> 00:41:04,159 and then that is a 17 uh all of those will hit nine for number one 11 for number two 552 00:41:04,559 --> 00:41:09,679 uh and 12 for number three yeah you hit them and then blood is like 553 00:41:10,719 --> 00:41:14,719 well not even blood is like this black blackish red 554 00:41:14,719 --> 00:41:21,839 ichor that's flowing down onto the floor of this uh of the machine um they are they're 555 00:41:21,839 --> 00:41:28,399 knocked down they are all three are prone um they are writhing on the floor uh in front 556 00:41:28,400 --> 00:41:34,559 of you you're in the machine uh anything else you can or would like to do i mean i guess i 557 00:41:34,559 --> 00:41:43,200 could use my second attack action oh right you got a second attack yeah i sure do uh so yeah 558 00:41:43,200 --> 00:41:48,720 there's three writhing on the ground not looking too uh much of a concern and then the 559 00:41:48,720 --> 00:41:55,360 big big boy uh well okay well they're all out of the way i'll go back to focusing on 560 00:41:56,320 --> 00:42:03,840 sorry also one in the driver's seat now but he isn't driving anywhere like we are still stationary 561 00:42:03,840 --> 00:42:10,720 you are still stationary yeah okay then i will leave him for the time being okay all right 562 00:42:10,720 --> 00:42:21,120 uh so to hit the big guy first one was a 21 second is a 17 third is a 12 it's about as 563 00:42:21,119 --> 00:42:29,119 bad as it gets all of those will hit okay he's not a hyper mobile big fleshy blob of grossness 564 00:42:29,920 --> 00:42:39,679 perfect uh 13 on the first one 12 on the second and nine on the third so 34 565 00:42:40,719 --> 00:42:48,799 wowsers yeah carving into this creature before you you don't kill them but describe the scene 566 00:42:49,360 --> 00:42:54,640 as it's playing out as you are in like this essentially shoe box with all of these monsters 567 00:42:55,519 --> 00:43:01,280 and creatures that you're you're carving up yeah it's kind of a like you know if you've ever 568 00:43:01,280 --> 00:43:08,960 been for like benihana it's kind of like that there's a lot of like a lot of sword 569 00:43:08,960 --> 00:43:13,600 tricks a lot of form i got going on here dicing into little bits flipping things up 570 00:43:13,600 --> 00:43:18,400 you know catching body parts under your hat then revealing it in the pocket all that 571 00:43:18,400 --> 00:43:27,280 stuff it's all good awesome uh night hunter your turn okay so night hunter has moved to the front 572 00:43:27,280 --> 00:43:34,160 there how many are still alive like one next no that one's dead too that one's dead too 573 00:43:34,160 --> 00:43:40,639 okay well then night hunter is going to uh crawl or climb up the side of the big vehicle 574 00:43:41,200 --> 00:43:46,320 i didn't see what the party is going on so you as you're climbing up you see lip synci 575 00:43:46,320 --> 00:43:53,280 who's fallen onto one of these blades oh i want to help her i reach down and i like pull her off 576 00:43:53,280 --> 00:43:59,600 a blade are you a real small friend oh i mean i've been better but really i just want to get 577 00:43:59,600 --> 00:44:05,039 in there oh i can give you lift thank you i throw her up 578 00:44:07,600 --> 00:44:12,880 do you uh climb up after too as well yes uh so yeah you throw lip synci up lip synci do you 579 00:44:13,519 --> 00:44:20,079 want to land inside the machine like do a tuck somersault or sure i mean i guess there is an 580 00:44:20,079 --> 00:44:27,440 open hole at the top where i pulled the lid off so yeah let's just hope there's no 581 00:44:27,440 --> 00:44:31,760 spinning blade right where i land i guess i know there's not because i looked through 582 00:44:31,760 --> 00:44:37,599 the machine so fly up into the air and land down inside the machine and flint is just like 583 00:44:37,599 --> 00:44:43,679 tearing up everything inside uh night hunter you climb up and follow behind you are able to 584 00:44:43,679 --> 00:44:49,920 get inside as well uh i turn around and see the driver uh yeah you would be able to see the 585 00:44:49,920 --> 00:44:56,960 driver yeah all right i want to attack the driver with my uh with corpse grinder he turns 586 00:44:56,960 --> 00:45:02,719 around and like just like catches your eye as you swing as your as he sees your axe swinging 587 00:45:02,720 --> 00:45:13,920 down on top of them uh 26 yes oh my god max damage yes that's what's up 19 yeah yeah uh 588 00:45:13,920 --> 00:45:18,800 straight hit to like i mean there's really only one place to hit him based on how the 589 00:45:18,800 --> 00:45:23,680 the cockpit's built you're gonna hit him in the face uh so your axe cleaves down into his 590 00:45:23,680 --> 00:45:29,600 head um and like into the backs of the seat that he's sitting in and like sticks back out 591 00:45:29,599 --> 00:45:36,880 like almost like swings back down towards you yeah it's pretty gross but i mean amy says 592 00:45:36,880 --> 00:45:44,079 ew night hunter has an enormous smile on their face uh and they turn around and am i now faced 593 00:45:44,079 --> 00:45:49,599 with the back of this gross big blob monster yeah there's like a weird dance happening around 594 00:45:49,599 --> 00:45:54,159 so like lip sync is kind of between the two of you but flint is like mushed to the side 595 00:45:54,159 --> 00:46:02,480 like just like stabbing into it i want to like soccer mom arm lip sinkie to the side as i swing 596 00:46:02,480 --> 00:46:12,000 corpse grinder down um onto the back of this um flesh golem awesome oh no uh 19 i don't know 597 00:46:12,000 --> 00:46:21,359 why i said oh no for that and oh my god max damage again oh my god 19 a hideous demonic 598 00:46:21,360 --> 00:46:28,800 like whale echoes out in this space your axe is lodged deep within the flesh of this golem 599 00:46:29,680 --> 00:46:36,320 Vorunax so i got all these imps around me yes and uh i just look around and i look at them and say 600 00:46:37,039 --> 00:46:44,400 today you will fall to the will of ordinary people doing good things and i'm gonna cast 601 00:46:44,400 --> 00:46:51,120 thunder step uh and i'm gonna teleport myself to the top of the tank and they need to make 602 00:46:51,119 --> 00:46:58,880 a constitution saving throw dc 20 or take 3d 10 thunder damage i mean i'm gonna give them all 603 00:46:58,880 --> 00:47:04,880 a try on a failed and half on that success yeah no they all failed uh one of them extra miserably 604 00:47:04,880 --> 00:47:13,119 with a nat one fantastic let's see that is 12 thunder damage uh in total and that thunder 605 00:47:13,119 --> 00:47:20,719 can be heard up to 300 feet away it echoes out across the plains and they all like explode 606 00:47:20,720 --> 00:47:29,760 as soon as it hits them and this fiery gory mess all five of them are dead as you land back 607 00:47:29,760 --> 00:47:34,720 up on top of the uh the machine i can kind of gauge the situation that's going on inside 608 00:47:35,680 --> 00:47:43,760 yeah cool okay so uh the last thing left is this big thing um just just one big thing left 609 00:47:43,760 --> 00:47:49,600 i think i think this has it even never gotten a turn once i think yeah once uh not not even 610 00:47:49,920 --> 00:47:55,920 so let's give it a turn just see what it just can see what it can do i wasn't what i was no 611 00:47:55,920 --> 00:48:05,440 yeah that's a good idea uh is more of a haha yeah i mean it's just a big i'm a big girls monster 612 00:48:06,319 --> 00:48:14,000 punchy guy so uh it's gonna make just two slam attacks at flint uh it doesn't uh i think 613 00:48:14,000 --> 00:48:18,639 the highest one was a 15 there yeah that won't do it yeah so it's just trying to like 614 00:48:19,360 --> 00:48:26,480 get position in this place but all of you uh at this point like how i picture this scene 615 00:48:26,480 --> 00:48:34,000 kind of playing out is like Vorunax climbs in and shuts the door behind him and there's just 616 00:48:34,000 --> 00:48:39,280 it's rocks back and forth until there's just like a splat across all the windows 617 00:48:39,600 --> 00:48:45,840 yeah and grants us are just watching from the outside yeah just being like i wouldn't want to be 618 00:48:45,840 --> 00:48:51,040 that thing no yeah they should have built the doors a little bit bigger maybe it could have 619 00:48:51,040 --> 00:48:56,240 gotten out god do you think oh it's gonna be everywhere yeah no it's gotten into everything 620 00:48:56,240 --> 00:49:00,720 like everybody's everybody's gonna have to have that's gonna need some they probably don't they 621 00:49:00,720 --> 00:49:05,040 probably don't have baths down here this is not good do you think there's like a squeegee or 622 00:49:05,039 --> 00:49:10,719 something can't even see if those windows anymore lip sync is a big hand that wipes across the 623 00:49:10,719 --> 00:49:16,400 front and i picture lip sync he like just giving a big wave from inside as everybody 624 00:49:16,400 --> 00:49:22,559 climbs into the machine and like rolls out as much of the gross that's in there out the side 625 00:49:22,559 --> 00:49:31,279 door as it hits the ground uh and the door is shut closed we see everybody go up to the the 626 00:49:31,280 --> 00:49:37,600 helm the cockpit of this machine and look around does anybody know how to start it 627 00:49:37,600 --> 00:49:46,000 uh i search a nearby body of one of the uh red caps see if i can find a coin and i i looked 628 00:49:46,000 --> 00:49:53,280 under like the visor like they always do in movies and thea hops out and grabs the movable 629 00:49:53,280 --> 00:50:02,480 rod good call uh a movable rod moved bodies looted uh you find a total of seven soul 630 00:50:02,480 --> 00:50:08,800 coins from various uh creatures and positions uh hidden within did you want to do something 631 00:50:08,800 --> 00:50:11,920 with those soul coins or you just you were just looking to find yeah i'll start looking 632 00:50:11,920 --> 00:50:16,480 around with uh flint at the front and see if there's anything i can do with these uh bad 633 00:50:17,440 --> 00:50:24,079 they resonate in your hand and there's there's this this painful ring that kind of hits your 634 00:50:24,079 --> 00:50:32,159 ears as you as you see them um flint you see a a coin slot on the dashboard that looks 635 00:50:32,159 --> 00:50:37,920 like it's the perfect size for one of these soul coins give it a shot i flip flint a coin 636 00:50:38,480 --> 00:50:45,360 coins flipped flint slides it in and the engine roars to life as it screams out across 637 00:50:45,360 --> 00:50:50,880 the landscape russ begins to roll towards the watchtowers of the river sticks 638 00:50:53,840 --> 00:51:00,079 Dumbgeons and Dragons season two episode 137 starring Amy More as thea and night hunter 639 00:51:00,079 --> 00:51:06,079 carla max dead as lip sync he tom laird as flint with kyle Claset as Vorunax and Russ More 640 00:51:06,079 --> 00:51:11,519 as your dungeon master dialogue editing by carla max dead and sound design by Russ More 641 00:51:11,519 --> 00:51:16,000 this episode featured music from epidemic sound and art list and sound effects from 642 00:51:16,000 --> 00:51:20,960 epidemic sound boom library and sound ideas and a huge thank you to our supporting producers 643 00:51:20,960 --> 00:51:27,360 gabriel lynch jessica babich cat water flame jacob madden christian brown craig zeiss erin 644 00:51:27,360 --> 00:51:33,840 stevens perry matey kayla littlejohn la branton old school gamer d nathaniel teeter destiny 645 00:51:33,840 --> 00:51:40,880 garcia and ryan car join us today at Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast and receive hundreds 646 00:51:40,880 --> 00:51:46,320 literal hundreds of hours of bonus content hangouts with the cast and a whole lot more 647 00:51:46,320 --> 00:51:53,920 you have a great week we'll talk to you soon uh you've just you've just 648 00:51:55,760 --> 00:52:03,039 what's the word i'm looking for just hurled yourself down the brambly bony hell yeah all 649 00:52:03,039 --> 00:52:09,519 right what what fucking level am i 18 okay cool i sorry i can't remember dungeons and 650 00:52:09,519 --> 00:52:13,679 dragons is a dumb dragons production